Friday, 5 August 2011

Adjusting



I am now an old hat at long distance relationships.  Well, I judge myself to be anyhow.  This year (our 5th year together) is the first time MR and I have lived together, prior to that we were living about 3 hours apart and he was also working out on the mines so we only saw each other one weekend out of 3, 4, 5 or 6 weeks depending on what shift he was working.  We are awesome at talking.  Well, it sort of goes without saying that I am awesome at talking, so more to the point, MR is awesome at both talking and listening to me waffle.  When we are not together we talk on the phone pretty much every night for between 10 minutes (when he is running late for night shift/really tired from a long day) up to an hour.  When he asks me how my day was he actually is interested and listens.  And then when I ask how his day was I listen carefully and try to understand what he is talking about when he says he was changing the bucket on the digger and the drive shaft came loose which meant they had to reconfigure the someothermechanicalterm and it took eight hours.     

Last time I dropped him at the airport we were reminiscing on how I used to have a few tears whenever he left.  Not a real cry; just a pain in the heart, a few tears and then lots of "humphs" and mopiness after he left.  Living together is wonderful, even though I still only see him one week out of three, it is still a luxury to me to have this large amount of time.  However, it does come with some new issues.

Previously, it was 'my house' or 'his house' and the other was just visiting.  Now it is 'our home' and when he is away it feels like he is missing and the home just isn't functioning right without him.  There is someone missing on the couch next to me, just me (and The Meow) in our bed, no one to cook the meat on the bbq while I make a salad, no one to talk to (The Meow is not a big conversationalist) and really, I'm finding it a bit lonely. 

You would think, after five years of living in a town where I had no family and for two years of it no friends around me that I would not feel lonely now but apparently I have some readjusting to do.  I'm back at the humphs and mopiness stage (although thankfully no tears). 

I've already rung my Dad, sister and Mum to chat and to see what they are up to this weekend (all busy) and my bestie is off holidaying and really I'm feeling rather broke so the weekend is stretching lonely (I feel like I should be saying lonelyly, although obviously not) and quietly ahead.  (Normally I love quiet relaxing weekends in my pyjamas so this is a very strange feeling for me)  I think a big long sleep followed by some comfort baking for a yummy breakfast and then an I'm grateful post to get me out of the doldrums and focusing on that silver lining (sleeping in, reading, crafting, blogging, sitting on the couch doing sweet FA and not feeling guilty) are definitely on the cards.
   

4 comments:

2paw said...

I am sorry you have the 'humph' and are feeling mopey. I hope you find something cheery to do this weekend. I like lonelyly!!! Maybe you need to go where there are lots of people and wander amongst them. Labradors are much more chatty than cats!!

Wendy Sice said...

I don't usually feel lonely either, but one night a few weeks ago both hubby and son were out, and I actually felt strangely lonely. So I get it.

I always have the tele on, so I can hear voices in the house, or I take advantage of watching a DVD that my boys wouldn't be interested in watching.

I think it's probably the amount of children and adults we see during our working week that does this to us - we're used to lots of little people saying our names over and over!

Take care, and enjoy the chance to do whatever you like!! xx

Sam said...

sounds like you have plenty to keep you occuppied, you're never alone in blogland either :-)

Baa-Me Kniits said...

That is so true, we are all here in Blogland :-) Hope the doldrums lift and your weekend pans out OK. Comfort cooking sounds good and reading in bed, and living in your PJ's.....I think I could do with a weekend like yours, Hubby has gone to work as well but I have the two active boys to look after :-)